“I hear your winter and I hear you rain and I gave my life away and I feel no pain”
A week of this hybrid school to go and then spring break and then 5 days a week with big masked classes. Closest to normal we’ve been in a year. It’s very pleasant out and we woke up a little late and went for a walk and got some groceries and then went and watched a basketball game and had a tasty selection of beers and food at a local establishment we like. The air outside has only a tinge of chill and smells of sun and hope. Optimism seems relatively safe today. People smile and carry with them thoughts of empathy toward the social structures in which they find themselves. The damp grass seems to be trying to resemble what it will be in a month or two, teaching all who notice a lesson on the importance of having a short memory from time to time. Vicious cycles seem absurd today. Learning and growing carry sun dappled Saturdays, be they few and far. My favorite song is on now and I have heard it literally a million times and I love that it has remained my top since the first time I heard the first note and I’m ok that it trots out in reality or in my head for the best things I’ve done as well as the very very very worst. But today is not for that, and that doesn’t have clearance on days like this. Days like this I think we’re going to make it. I think it’s worth it. Happiness is not abstract but tangible but plausible and current and flowing and now. Applesauce indeed, lady. For realsies. Let’s all smile and wait for the next commercial to end so we can numb the dumb and float through the rest of our drifted days of mercy, grace, courage and forgetful forgiveness of ourselves and all the rest. The relevance of beauty. A fragrance all-consuming for the sensibly challenged on days like this. Ahhh. Love is all around us and is the answer to all quandaries ever.
-when you need to submit something and writing is too important to you to not bare soul embarrassingly (usually) and you did something real hard that day and came out aliver than you thought you would after years of envisioning it but don’t want to write about its bigness for various and shameful reasons